Friday, November 6, 2009

My Baby's big Day


So here we are, it's Senior night for Jenny tonight and I even know what that means.  As my girls grow up, I am more and more Americanized.  What will I do when they are out of the house and living their own lives?  They are the ones teaching me the newest lingo, correct my English, and roll their eyes when I just don't get it.  I shall stay on topic.  Senior night.  Jenny is all excited and sad at the same time.  Marching Band is coming to an end, but if her team keeps winning, there is always another Friday of meeting with her buddies and going crazy in the stands.  Four years of High school marching Band and once that's over she still has her concert band going, but whom are we kidding?  It's just not the same, although she enjoyes the sophistication and is proud to be first chair flute, marching band is just quite the different animal, which fits her crazy personality really well.  Senior night is also bringing along Realization.







I still remember her first day of school in America.  I didn't know what to expect, starting with the fact that a school bus will stop at the house and pick up my little girl.  It's funny, I can still bring forth the image in my brain of her turning around mid way up the bus stairs, looking at me and wearing that big, big smile.  And when she returned after what felt like an eternity, but really have been only 4 hours, she couldn't stop talking about her first day in school.  By the time she was 13, she had been in more schools than grades. 


Now that it is Senior night, I am close to tears.  Next month, my little baby is turning 18 years of age.  I still catch myself often, staring at her and getting lost in memories.  I can still feel her tiny hand in mine, still recall how soft her baby feet were, I can still hear her baby laughter.  And now, this is her last year of High school.. why the heck did time have to run this fast?  




She will be off to Hawaii this coming summer to study Marine Biology.  She will grow into womanhood while away from home, away from me.








This is soooo crazy.  I didn't sign up for this when I had my girls.  Where I come from, we keep Family together.  Your children move out and move perhaps down the street or to the other side of town, which usually is just 30 minutes away at most.  In America, the sense of family seems to get lost with the beginning of college and that makes me sad.  All I will have from here on out are maybe long weekends and holidays with my Jenny.  But then I will feel how my mom must feel, I assume.  My mom was such a proud grandma for Jenny's first two years of life.  My mom doesn't show emotions openly.  When I told her that I was pregnant, she got up and left without a word.  I must say, it was an odd feeling she left behind.  Four hours later, she returned and handed me a huge bag.  Inside, all you need for a new born and on her face, a little smile.  These days, she hardly knows the girls.  Every time we come for a visit, my mom smiles and takes the girls away on shopping sprees and gosh knows all the things she does with them.  I have to say, I am afraid of the day Jenny moves away.


But tonight is her night and I will join her in her smiles and laughter.

21 comments:

  1. Your daughter was such a cute kid. She definitely looks like you. It sounds like good memories and plenty more to come. I hope I'm as good a dad as you seem to be a mom.

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  2. I agree with Liam, she is certainly your girl.. I hope tonight is all that it should be for her.... She's beautiful, just like her mother. No matter where she goes... no matter her age... she's as much a part of you as you are her.... I know you weren't looking for those types of words... I just couldn't help myself. :)

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  3. Liam -- thank you. Parenting is not a tough job, you'll see. As long as you stay focused and true to what you want for your child.. you'll see. Parenting to me was and is soooo much fun combined with so much learning. You will be the father you set out to be if along the way you don't lose focus.. you will see ;-) I wish you the best time of your life raising your child/children :-)

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  4. Marrrryyyyyy -- your words triggered the ole tear ducts to react... where are the freakin' tissues when you need them?.. nevertheless, thank you always for your kind words!!!! hug?

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  5. Such a beautiful, heartfelt tribute to Jenny... and those pictures are enough to melt a heart... I know what it is like to have a daughter, a first born, pick up and leave the nest... yet mine is only two hours away, not a whole continent like yours will be. Liane, I love how you weave memories and pictures together, and how your stories tug at the heart, and make one smile and reflect at the same time. These memories are so, so precious... and you have done such a wonderful job of instilling such great life lessons to her, and have been such a great role model as well... She will always be an outstanding monument to the mother whom she so much resembles, in so many ways. Huge hugs to you, and thank you for sharing this.

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  6. Oh my what memories you stirred up in me when I read that. First I would like to send my congratulations to Jenny. I know the feelings you are going thru and have been there myself (many, many years ago). Both my daughter and son were into band and music, my son more than most and I was involved right along with them as chaperone and band equipment truck driver for 8 years. OHHHHH the late nights!

    April and I had the same thoughts about when they were ready to leave the nest, but shortly after the first one left we found ourselves wound so tight back into the 2nds school activities it wasn’t as bad. Then after the last one left the nest it was a different story, af first it seemed weird, especially on Friday’s and Saturdays. I found myself saying what no game tonight, no competition tonight, what a I going to do…lol). My family called me pathetic but it was the life I lived for many years, around my children.

    Those were the good times, full of memories. Cherish them and live them to the fullest.

    Again all the best to Jenny.

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  7. Tom -- you always say such lovely words.. you make me feel like I know what I'm doing with this writing thing, even though I know I'm not ;-)

    Curt -- Leaving the nest..lol.. yes, i know i will be busy still with Julia once Jenny is gone, and i don't even want to think how crazy i will get when Julia is leaving too (in 3 years)... ggrrrrr

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  8. Hugs...

    always...

    and always you will have to pry me away. xo

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  9. I can not look into her face and not see you... Wow... Talk about life starting again in a simple smile... She has turned into a beautiful woman and all in part to a wonderful Mommy... I set and think about my boys and joke about how many years I have left till I finally get to kick them out but I know when that day comes it will be a hard one for me as it is for you... When I left home at 18 to join the Army it was after living in the same house my entire life and I can still remember my mom setting on the couch as I walked out that door... She and I aren't the ones to show emotions to each other but the last words I said was "Well this is it.. I love you.. See you when I am done... I got into the recuriters car and have been back maybe 20 times in 20 years... I am sure you will have way more with your daughter than I have given my mother and that is because you and her are the same and identical and she will always come home when mommy calls...lol...

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  10. Oooh that's soooo cute - I am not really maternally inclined as I'm still a big self centered kid myself but that was one of the (very) rare times when reading your post I could almost see myself as a mother..

    XOXO as always,

    Wifey

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  11. Mary -- perhaps i don't want to pry you away.. have you thought of that? ;-)

    Michael -- you know, i have been in America for almost 16 years now and my mom saw the girls perhaps 4 times, last time in 2006. My mom and I haven't gotten along all that well either.. it was great when i was a little kid and my sister wasn't born.. but then all changed.. emotions have left the building and didn't return. I moved out in the age of 18 as well.. but just around the corner... boy is that a long story and perhaps one to keep to myself ;-) I hope i will have soooo much more with Jenny... there is sooo much that somehow connects us and hopefully, this will not get lost, no matter the distance. but you know what, Lewis always jokes around about breaking the plate soon, but i can see that this is going to break his heart, when his little girl is actually doing just that.. breaking the plate..

    Wifey -- your comment made me smile. I am such a kid myself and many thought, i should not have had children until i finally grow up..lol. On the other hand, perhaps not growing up came as a benefit to my girls.. who knows... so i take your comment as a compliment, thank you ;-)

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  12. She's beautiful eh. A clone of you. The pic with the white blouse and flute, thought that was you!
    I think this whole post is beautiful, all the warmth and fuzziness of it. I can't wait to be a dad :D
    well, actually, technically I do have to wait :))

    but anyway it's easy to see that she's your daughter through and through :)

    Kay

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  13. Thomas has left a new comment on your post "Good morning, my fine friends":

    You should be very, very proud of such a beautiful person that you put into this world. I’m sure she’s somebody that will change the world in her own way.

    And for the record parenting is the hardest thing in the world to do. ~BAR-NONE~ look at the facts with families nowadays. Hardly it seems anybody can do it right any more. You look to have accomplished this though. The pinnacle of the hardest moment is the day you have to let her go….

    *it’s ok to let the tears roll*

    [blogger didn't want to display the comment, i guess... i sooo dislike websites with an attitude..lol.. anyway, so i did the ole cut and paste from my e-mail]

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  14. Kay -- I have a friend who calls Jenny "Little Liane" ;-) it's funny, if it's me and jenny, people say exactly that, that she looks just like me, but if she is with Lewis, the same can be said.. she has more from Lewis than me actually, and especially in her face... But i don't mind when people say that she looks like me, and Jenny doesn't have an issue with it either.. we just have to figure out if they say it as a compliment or not..lol . Always sooo nice to see you Kay ;-)

    Thomas -- nice to see you again ;-) let's stay inside of those records, if we may... I do disagree that parenting is the hardest thing to do.. at least not in my case. HOwever, in general, I know that a lot of people do have a hard time and I understand very well why. Your sentence of her changing the world in her own way gave me some shivers down my spine. She sure has changed my world and continues to do so. So i take it you are a dad?

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  15. Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Good morning, my fine friends":

    Hey Liane.. (_)P (_)p of course...lol
    So this is where ya been hiding out huh !
    Well I got deleted from tagged a Zillion times..
    So such it is..Been on Multiply it ok.
    This is a nice page Gurl.Got All My fav pics up as well;-)
    Well its Sunday morning and Yesss I am ready for a b/day party this afternoon. And Yesss tha Weekend Rocked ALL Night Long ! *grins* Billydee...

    [wow, had to do the paste and copy thingy from my e-mail again.. what's up with blogger???]

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  16. Billyyyyyyyy -- wow.. it's been a while since i saw you around... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! I do have a multiply page as well, but i am hardly on that site as i don't have much time to stay there and chat :-( come by more often if you can.. how is your art going????

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  17. Indeed that’s true and I enjoyed every moment… Well looking back now I can say that. Someday I hope to enjoy and watch there parenting skills.

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  18. My weekend was full... cleared brush, cut firewood, cleaned out the eaves, generally got the ranch ready for that winter thing... it was beautiful here, us up in the 60s and was just great to be outside. No relaxing for this guy, have more aches and pains than you can shake a stick at, but it's all good, as I got lots done, and enjoyed it all... How about you?

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  19. Here I am again, with a request for you. I know that you are busy and have so much going on... Today, as you are probably well aware, is the 20th anniversary of the falling of the Berlin Wall. You were there, maybe not at the wall, but in Berlin as this was happening. Could you tell us about your memories of that time, and how it all strikes you now... I would love to hear your feelings, as for you, not all of this has been the best of things that could happen, though the world views it as a wonderful thing... As a Berliner, please, if you could, tell us about your feelings about the wall, about the wall coming down 20 years ago, and anything else that you might want to add, with your own, lovely, unique way of saying things. I would love it... and your followers would to, I think... huge hugs for a great day! And thank you... for everything.

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  20. They grow up fast and i think about when both the girls will be moving out.
    Alot
    Mostly because they say they aren't because the rent is cheap (free) and the can't find a better housekeeper (me).
    Rats

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  21. Walker -- LOL.. isn't that just typical? the motivation to stick around is not the love for their parents, but the free ride..LOL

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